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Yesterday I was reading a blog I frequent. It was late, for me, to even be awake but my eyes just wouldn't stay shut so I finally gave up and perused the web. Amanda couldn't sleep either (which is a bigger deal for her because she still has kids at home) so she posted a list of what she would like in a local friend.
It's funny how we are often drawn to the blogs of people who are like minded/hearted with us. They remind us of ourselves, or who we want to be. They make sense of things we haven't been able to put into words just yet. They challenge our abilities or encourage us to try. We dream together; often without the other even knowing what they have done in the few short sentences they published.
I found myself nodding as I read her friendship canon. I think just about everyone who was commenting on Amanda's post said they met her criteria. All, that is, except the very first point - local. What is it about being in the same social spaces as someone and never taking the time or expending the energy to actually get to know them? I'm guilty. But I don't want to be. I want relationship - for giving & for receiving.
my own list of what I wish I had locally in a girlfriend:
*a talker - Not a dominatrix, but a storyteller, a relator, an anecdotist. I'm a listener, and I need someone full of stories and questions! Not that I don't talk, I just need someone to keep the conversation going or be completely okay with silence!
*a friend - 2 way. Give & Take. Pursue & Pursued.*a collaboratrise - Plot, scheme, plan, execute!
*must have a wicked sense of humor, wry is also good - make me laugh and I am
able to discuss anything from urtexts to the best way to prepare eggplant.
*must have a deep appreciation for random pop culture references & carry on a conversation in movie quotes
* must be creative
* wildly confident
* full of her own dreams and ideas to pursue and want to share them &/or let me share in them
* laughs loudly - to the point of snorting could be bonus points here!
* must have great taste in books and music (absolutely no country allowed)
* loyal & kind
* interested in health, & being healthy
* preferably with a cool husband (because really, it is so dang hard to find friends where you like both of them)
* doesn’t ask to borrow my makeup - ew!
* is comfortable showing up at my house for coffee in pjs, getting dog hair on her socks, & making herself at home in my kitchen.
* fan of friday afternoon margarita happy hour, or just happy hour over a glass(es) of wine at home - with me.
Life is meant to be shared, don't you think?